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BRIGHT, SHINY OBJECTS
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Ah, glorious distractions. You know what I'm talking
about: sitting at your desk, playing computer solitaire, avoiding the thing you "should" be doing. Avoiding unpleasantries such as paying your bills or working on that report for your boss, or calling your headshot photographer to set up new shots. National Geographic aired a special years ago that studied a group of monkeys in Africa. The local tribe would trap the monkeys by putting bright shiny objects in small holes in trees, making sure the monkeys saw them doing it. From a distance, the tribesmen watched as the monkeys would reach into the trees to retrieve the bright shiny objects, and with their hands clenched around them, they couldn't pull them out. They were so intent on hanging onto the bright shiny objects that when the tribesmen would approach and even slip bags over the heads of the monkeys, they wouldn't let go. Silly monkeys. I often find myself so randomly intrigued by bright shiny objects that I actually sabotage myself from what I want. Ever have a similar experience? Here are some of the things I get distracted by: Meaningless computer games. Tweaks that make my computer run faster. Little projects around the house. Fluffy news stories. Scandalous news stories. Shocking news stories. OK, news stories in general. It's not as though these things are a higher priority than, say, for example, writing my newsletter sometime before my assistant's deadline. Or marketing my coaching & training business. And the real problem is that while I'm indulging in my bright shiny objects I'm not really enjoying it, constantly thinking about the thing I "should" be doing. While all this is going on, I know that at the end of the day I'd make myself much happier by getting done what I want to get done. Why do we do that to ourselves? Here's my theory: whatever the real priority is in the moment, i.e., that thing I really want to get done, has pressure attached to it. It has to be good or right (at least that's the story we make up). My newsletter, for example has to have a powerful impact on my beloved readers. Marketing efforts toward building my practice has to have a positive outcome. So there I sit at my computer, faced with an unconscious decision between working on this thing that has to be exactly right or something that's marginally enjoyable but that I won't judge myself about. And my ego wants to choose for me. How to overcome this cycle that keeps me stuck? For me it's by continuously reminding myself that I do what I do because I enjoy it, because it's meaningful, and because of the satisfaction I feel as a result. I remind myself that failure is a good thing and that while I don't strive for it, I love it because it brings me deeper learning. It's not a perfect method, but it works, because I enjoy the process again. I get refocused on what I really want, not on what my inner-critic wants. And like most things, it takes time to get in the habit, but now that I am, I can lift the pressure off more easily and naturally. The best thing about this is that I get to look back on the day's work, or the month's work, or a few years work with a sense of pride and fulfillment, and that's more than worth the effort it takes to get the work done. I've included a worksheet to help you identify your bright shiny objects, look at what your inner-critic wants to tell you about what you should be doing, and how to allow-- rather than force--yourself to be more productive. RJ |
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© 2006 The Actor's Success & Robin Jones. All rights reserved. Robin Jones is a Certified Professional Life Coach specializing in helping actors beat the odds of the business and build thriving careers. Visit www.ActorsSuccess.com to move your career forward now. Help me reach my goal of 3000 subscribers by 2007 ~ forward this to a friend or colleague!
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Feature Article:
Bright, Shiny Objects